short trip without my happiness

i’m sitting on this chair that makes me unconfortable and is not because of it, but because of my mind who is already flying before me getting on board on the road to Athens. “don’t worry”, i am telling my self. “i’ll be back later on”. but what should i do till then all alone?

there are 15 more minutes till check in and i feel like i haven’t took everything with me, like i left the most important thing back home. i don’t know why, maybe is because of the distance who is telling me that i will feel more alone with each meter as I distanced from my happiness.

who knows, maybe i am afraid that i will be gone one day for good, and that day is near..too near and then i can not do anything else for my happiness because it will be late, so why i am not acting now on getting it back what makes me happy? my feelings are telling me that the gods are with me, but my mind is telling me to letting go. now i am asking you, what should i do? my mind is acting logical and my feelings are acting on what my heart feels, who is right and who is wrong, or it does not matter, and i should do what my instinct is telling me?  then i should pick up the phone but wait, actually i should get up from this chair and go faster then the speed of light straight to take back my happiness because i now know that i left her without telling her what i really feel, i though i already did but i’m sure i haven’t did it in the right way at the right time. i know she wants me to talk with her or maybe is just me…

my mind is acting like this because someone told it what to do and what not to, but my instinct is what i feel or maybe my instinct means the informations that help me understand and act in vary situations fast.

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damn the sun is so lighting and heating like we are in a summer morning, but from what i see, the sun light can’t pass thru the intens clouds, otherwise it was ssssumer time. we should think at something to do with this clouds. a rocket or something to spread them away.

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now i remember how is to desire to return home..maybe just because is the place called home, don’ no… my flight is on the schedule, but i hope it wont be any delays like in the morning, because it was the same as now when i was waiting for boarding, and when i arrived i were 30 minutes delayed…

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so, i guess i had no delayed back to bucharest, actually i recovered 5 minutes but this doesn’t make me forget about the 12 people that were late and the flight had a lil delay in departing but the pilot must knew a short route by coming earlier and recovered the time lost.

anyway my mind fast moved away to smiling because the flight attendant had no time on showing her ‘show’ on surviving – about this, she asked me to stay next to the emergency door in case of something was going to go wrong. i was like ‘say what? are you expecting anything to happen or you are part of who know what sort of free willy organisation? – let’s get back on the survivor guide. as we were preparing for taking off. of course the plane was taking speed and the flight attendant also because she didn’t had time to do it looking at her i was kinda sorry for her because she seems to be a rookie and she was giving her best.

anyway, soon as i landed i forgot about her because of the pilot who took his license on playstation, but i did not forget about the blonde who was again and again looking quietly to see where i am.. blah blah blah.